Giant Robot Monkeys!

I'm not real big on political humor. Most of the time I don't get it because I don't follow politics too closely. However this one I get a laugh out of.

Summer Flash-Back

Today I took some time to update and clean up the
Crash Effect Myspace.
I created a "master" blog entry that will hopefully drive some traffic to the Crash Effect site. Going back through the blog entries I came across a review I wrote last summer about the Flaming Lips show at the Minnesota State Fair. I'll paste it below. Ah Memories...

The Greatest Rock Show EVER!
Last Night was one of those nights I will remember
and cherish for a long time!
Anxiety and anticipation bubbled and churned in my stomach as I was looking for a place to park at the Minnesota State Fairgrounds. Rain poured in sheets so thick you could not see five feet in front of you. Water ran down streets like rivers a foot deep.
Was this going to be worth it? Is this even going to happen? I call my buddy who was supposed to be running camera for the event. Have they called the show yet? Do I even want to get out of the car? Or do I go find a coffee shop to stay warm and dry?
He replies with, "Well I'm literally standing in front of the stage in knee-deep water but they still think the show is going to happen..." Well then there is nothing for it. Tickets for the show and admission to the Fair have already be paid. Suck it up and get out of the car!
What... Am... I... Doing?!!! Lightnings though my brain as I step out of the car and into ankle deep waters. My shoes fill with cold dirty rainwater. Rain stings my face. Still I trudge on.
I resemble a Salmon swimming up-stream against the crowd of people desperately rushing for an escape to their vehicles. As I feel common sense beginning to creep into my mind it is violently flushed out by the sounds of fanatical Flaming Lips fans making war-cry like yells as they charge head down like rhinos into the Fairgrounds. My spirit lifted a rush of emotion overtakes me. My heart begins to pound. A beast within me begins to take over...
and that beast wants a cheese on a stick! Satisfying the beast with fried cheesy goodness I begin to subside back to myself and the rain begins to die down. All is good in the universe once again. I make my way into the Grand Stand after some roasted corn on the cob and park myself in front of the stage. Sonic Youth takes the stage and puts on a solid show. As I'm standing bobbing my head in proper rock show educate. The thought drifts though my mind... Sonic Youth looks kind of old now. They are more like Sonic Middle Age. They can still make a symphony of feedback like nobody's business. Than the moment I've been waiting for, as confetti cannons explode across the sky and Giant balloons bounce merrily above the crowd, a man in a giant bubble begins to crowd surf. The crowd goes nuts as a dozen Santa Clauses rush onto stage left and dance around in an excited group of monkeys sort of way. Meanwhile a dozen martian women go-go dancers shimmy and shake stage right. The music is euphorically explosive as the bubble crowd surfing man gets back to the stage just in time to leap out of the bubble and hit the microphone for the first verse.
More confetti and streamers blast into the crowd as the enormous screen behind the band lights up with the mouth camera of the frontman. Flat out, Hands Down, No Contest, this was the greatest rock spectacle these two eyes have ever seen. I've been to hundreds of shows large and small. This show blew them all out of the water both musically, visually, and with crowd participation. This was the biggest party in Minnesota! If you could harness the exuberant energy of a week of Mardi Gras, boil it down, bottle it, let if ferment, filter it, and harness it in pure raw form, and then release it in one location for two hours, you would then have the chemical makeup for this show. If you have ever attended a Flaming Lips show that you can give me an amen. If you have never had the privilege of attending a Flaming Lips show you need to! HaleFAlujia!

Well there you have it. My summer flash-back to last year. After reading over the entry above I'm finding myself in the mood for some fried cheese.

MinneSNOWta

We haven't had snow storms like this since I was a kid.
Which has been a large determining factor as to why I have never invested in a snow blower. The sissy winters we've had for the last decade haven't been enough to justify the garage real estate. That property has be reserved for my motorcycles.

Two weekends in a row of getting a butt whoopin' from Old Man Winter.
My wrists, shoulders, and back will be soar for a week after all the shoveling I've had to do.
We received somewhere in the neighborhood of 30 inches of snow with the two weekend white-outs. The snow was so deep that my last round of shoveling consisted of scooping and throwing chest high. Of course, in true Minnesota fashion, the moment you clear your driveway the snow plow comes by and puts a nice three foot bank at the end of your driveway for you to shovel. D'oh!

I enjoy the illusion that I'm bending the shovel. Not planned.

The other item that goes hand-in-hand with Minnesota snow storms is the road salt.
The images on the right are the normal color of our car. The images on the left are what our car looks like after ONE commute to work and back. Yuck.

My Favorite Game Ever.

After the Holidays Bobbi and I were putting all our Christmas stuff away. We decided that since were were already going to be crawling around in storage it would be a good time to go through our stuff.
Every couple of years we go though our belongings and decide
if we really need it or not.
I'm so glad I didn't marry a pack-rat! The way I'm wired is if we haven't used it 2 years we are probably never going to use it. I'm so grateful to have a wife with a similar mindset.
We separate our stuff into three piles. Keep. Toss. Donate.
It amazes me every time we do this how much stuff a person can accumulate in such a short amount of time! I don't consider myself a big consumer but I still can't believe how much stuff there is to part with every couple of years.
One of the items that has survived the many purgings is my Nintendo Entertainment System.
Oh yeah. That's right. Wii... Schmii. I'm talking square wired remotes with A and B buttons. Old School.

I used to have an Atari 2600 but after a number of years I just couldn't resuscitate it.
I've kept my NES since 1991 for one game and one game only.
It's been my favorite game and my adversary for sixteen years.
Mike Tyson's Punch-out!!

Glass Joe | Von Kaiser | Piston Honda | Don Flamenco | King Hippo | Great Tiger | Bald Bull | Soda Popinski | Mr. Sandman | Super Macho Man | Any of those names sound familiar?
I hadn't pulled the NES out of storage for eight years. I plugged it in, put in Punch-Out, hit the power button and first try, ding-ding-ding!, ding-ding-ding! The bell rang, the crowd cheer'd, and the music started . I was instantly in a nostalgic rush of adolescence. I was amazed. The sucker fired right up first try. No blowing on the cartridge. No blowing in the machine. No taking the game in and out a ton of times. First try baby!
There he was. The man himself looking at me.

In the Sixteen years of playing this game I fell into a vicious cycle every time.
I could blow through all the contenders getting TKOs or KOs in the first round for all of them.
Save for Super Macho Man. For some reason I could never get the timing down for dodging his super spin punch. I always knew what I had to do. I just couldn't execute.
He'd wind up and I'd dodge out of the way too early and step right back into the swing of his fist.
I fell right back into that cycle. I was so annoyed that I still couldn't beat him.
I took a break from the game and composed myself. I told myself "alright. slow down. ignore the sound effect and wait for the blink." AHH CRAP! I did it again! I dodged too early!
I gave myself a break from the game for a couple of days and then tried to pick it up again.
First try I finally beat Super Macho Man! Okay so now that I have the timing down I could beat him every time. Sometimes in the first round. Then it was on to the man himself. I'm not going to lie, I got nervous over a video game. I saw myself getting the crap pummelled out of me and getting my little digital ear bit off. After a few days of having the crap kicked out of me I finally got the timing all worked out and beat the game. It took me sixteen years. It just goes to show that with patience, hard work, and fast thumb-eye coordination you can be the heavy weight champion of the world. Now if I can only find my second favorite game. Rampage.
Below are some great Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!! videos. Enjoy!